As relational therapists...
We believe change happens, but it is often difficult work and occurs over a length of time, as client and therapist experience new relational possibilities together for the benefit of you, the client. We, the therapist and client, will work in a collaborative effort to understand the connections between what is occurring in the therapeutic relationship and your life.

This excerpt from Relational Psychotherapy: A Primer, by Patricia A DeYoung, describes three of the many important relational dynamics that we will address throughout the therapy process.

"I'm a relational therapist. So while I know that you feel bad inside, I also see that a lot of those bad feelings - worry, low self-esteem, fear of failing - exist at the boundary or interface where you meet the world. They're relational feelings as well as self-feelings. They sound like: "Am I good enough? Have I made a mistake in their eyes? Do they like me? Am I in trouble?" When you feel that the answers to these questions are negative, then you feel badly about yourself, in yourself. It seems to me that even when you're not thinking about it, you live with a lot of negative answers to those relational questions. And I think that's been true for quite a while, and it has worn you down.

In relational psychotherapy, we spend a lot of time on those relational feelings. They turn up in three main ways. First, there are your daily relationships with your family, friends, and co-workers. We'll look at what happens in those interactions that leaves you feeling badly about yourself. You might begin to notice patterns there that make you think of earlier relationships in your life. That would be the second way relational feelings would turn up in therapy. When those early relationships come to your mind, we will talk about how they told you who you are, what you're worth, and what you can get from life. Those early relationships can leave you with a powerful script about what you can expect even now. The third kind of relationship we'll keep in mind is the one between you and me, how you and I are working together. It will be especially important to notice if I'm misunderstanding you or if it feels to you that this therapy is becoming my agenda, not yours."